Google

Sunday, June 8, 2008

An old woman at Matheran

Lately, I have found myself becoming insensitive to my surroundings. Perhaps its the drain on mental energy making a career or perhaps its the subconscious Indian aspiration to disassociate oneself from aam junta. Whenever I look over the pictures I take, I feel them to be too touristy. They look like pictures taken by someone who has no time to pause and appreciate the surroundings for what they are. Along with this has crept in a general intolerance and suspicion of new people I meet, which might seem as normal behaviour for some.

But I have always enjoyed taking some time out and trying to see life from different perspectives. So when I was jolted out of my cocoon a few days ago by this old woman, I felt guilty.

I saw her as I was walking on the narrow guage railway track at Matheran. She sat there at the base of an advertising board, many of which have cropped up along the track, ruining the natural charm of the line and lining the pockets of the railway officers. She looked curiously at the tourists and I thought of her as some local woman waiting for her daughter in law to collect firewood. Her eyes darted from tourist to tourist. I zoomed on to her from my camera as she made a good picture. Exploitative photography.. we like to see poor people and then sigh and mutter that something has to be done and then go our way. While I was trying to get an angle on her, she called out to me and asked whether she could carry m
y bag. Immediately I dismissed her telling myself that I am a true trekker and would not allow anybody to carry my bag for me. As I walked away she pleaded to let her carry my bag and that she had nobody in this world.


I did not know how to react. The tone of the voice was so genuine, I was scared to even look back at her. I did nothing, just walked away but her voice kept haunting me. As I downloaded the pictures from my camera, I saw her picture and that look that did not betray her loneliness.

Is this how it is to be poor, old and lonely? What inner strength, what motivation drives her? I wished I had stopped and taken some time to understand her. But I was busy... busy returning home... yeah.